Tea House Theatre

Winner of Time Out Love London Awards 2014, 2016 & 2018!
Winner of the Best Closed Cafe Award 2020!

WELCOME TO THE TEA HOUSE THEATRE

Great news! Our tea subscription just landed! And we are offering a free UK delivery to all our tea subscribers. Have your favourite tea delivered every month for the whole year by buying it as a subscription.  With one simple purchase the cost of the tea will be debited every month and delivered to your door, so that you never run out.  One purchase, no worries and a constant supply of superb tea for whenever you need it.

And of course have a look at our range of excellent teas in our eTea shop if you want to buy just one off.

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Please browse the rest of our site if you have the time and we will see you soon.

We are based in an old Victorian public house that opened in 1886 on the site of the Vauxhall Pleasure Gardens; immortalised as the ‘Vanity Fair’ in Thackeray’s eponymous novel.

We serve some of the best loose leaf teas available, proper sandwiches and homemade cakes; not to mention the best full English breakfast in London. Our teas have individual subtle flavours which would be overpowered by the instant, coarse, hit of coffee, so we do not sell it.

We make our own marmalade and jams, all for sale by the jar and all our teas can be bought by the ounce online (to view our range click here). Our meat comes from our local butcher and our fruit and vegetables from the local market gardens around us.

We are trying to be different. We will not hurry you. If you visit us on your lunch break, then have one, you will be more productive in the afternoon. If you want to have a meeting, we will not disturb you. If you are ‘working from home’, we have wifi. If you have children, we have highchairs, a chest of toys, and milkshakes. We always have the daily papers, so please, relax, and share in what we are trying to create, take a load off, and have a cuppa.

Back to All Events

Park and Lane on Air!

Ticket: £10

Call on 0207 207 45 85/ 0207 820 01 41

or Book Here

Park and Lane are back due to popular demand (i.e. their accountant!) for a second slice of their own unique brand of comedy mayhem (and some carrot cake!)

See Park and Lane reverse forward into the golden age of 40’s / 50's British radio…

An age when people left their front doors open…hoping you would steal their powdered egg, if they were lucky.

Selfie’s were something you did under the bedsheets at night, with the aid of a torch and a copy of Health & Beauty, praying your mum wouldn’t walk in on you.

And TV was…bloody expensive, which meant radio was king and will be again!

So join the boys as they bring radio comedy back kicking and screaming into the present.

Who are Park and Lane?

Park & Lane are a writing and performing comedy team, comprising Daniel Graylyons and Simon M. James. They formed in September 2009.

Dan and Simon met while excavating a mummy's tomb at a dig in Luxor, Egypt. Dan was, at this time, one of Britain's foremost archaeologists and discovered Simon under a stone. Simon had been there for some time, playing the longest game of Hide and Seek in recorded history with his mother and father. Unfortunately, they had somehow forgotten about the seeking aspect of the game. Dan and his expert team (the all-girl Dishy Dozen, famed in archaeology circles for their hot pants and pith helmet look) also made the amazing discovery that, after giving Simon's baldy head a polish, at a certain angle he could be used as a human sun dial, due to the dazzle off his head and his hog ears…Oops!…Typo error?...

 

Starring Daniel Graylyons, Simon M. James

And The Park and Lane Players

Written by Daniel Graylyons, Simon M. James, Jack Gunn

Earlier Event: February 28
Back in the Day Talks